Skip to main content

Quote, Unquote - Part I

Quote, Unquote - Part I

At a restaurant after meal
Amy: Is there anything on my face?
Momo: Disappointment.

-----------------------------------

Subs: Money is not enough. Coming here and torturing people is like his cocaine. He gets high on that.

-----------------------------------

Viky: He has built a career on the misfortune of others.

-----------------------------------

Amy: Your sanitizer needs a sanitizer.

-----------------------------------

Amy: Those guys can’t handle girls screaming at them. Unless they are in bed. That will give them a major ego boost.

-----------------------------------

Amy: It’s not good to be too good.

-----------------------------------

Amy: Self-deprecating humour is always appreciated.

-----------------------------------

Viky: A writer’s best friend is not a dog, but a dictionary.

-----------------------------------

Amy: Hey, listen to this. Be who you were before all that stuff happened that dimmed your shine.
Viky: I think I’ll have to go back to the womb.

-----------------------------------

Viky: Before marriage, I used to go out with my friends. Now I don’t have any friends.

-----------------------------------

Viky: I’ve given my sweat and blood to this company.
Amy: I don’t know about blood. You have given a lot of sweat though.

-----------------------------------

Viky: If I was a Superhero, I would have been called Charbiman.

-----------------------------------

Amy: All projects are in the pipeline.
Viky: Just like my unborn babies. I am a true follower of our office culture.

-----------------------------------

Viky: Don’t look at negative people.
Amy: I’ll have to become Gandhari then.

-----------------------------------

Quora: Have you ever known someone who was too perfect?
Amy: I see that person in the mirror every day!

-----------------------------------

Viky (on call): I’d like to order chicken legs - not cut and cleaned.
Amy: So you like legs and you prefer them dirty?

-----------------------------------

Amy: One person at a time, we can change the world.

-----------------------------------

HR: Sad!
Viky: Our life described in one word, three letters.
Amy: Your life could be described with another three-letter word that begins with the same letter.
Viky: Add a Y to that word and I become the four-letter word.

-----------------------------------

Boss walks in
Amy: Here comes the Grinch!
Viky: The Grinch who stole Christmas, Diwali and Holi.
Labels:
Location: Mumbai, Maharashtra, India

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

8 Slang Terms Used in Mumbai - Part I

For anyone who was born and raised in Mumbai, ‘Bambaiya’ language is the native speak. It comes to Mumbaikars as naturally as the language they are accustomed to speaking in their households. Although it may sound crude or even impolite to someone who’s a visitor or a new resident of the city, it sure is fun and very useful in a lot of situations. Here is a list of a few slang phrases used exclusively in Mumbai. Tumhara bhi nahi, mera bhi nahi Translation: Not your price, not mine.  Meaning: Every street shopper in Mumbai has used this slang at some point in their lives to avoid getting fleeced. After a lot of bargaining, this phrase can be used either by the seller or the customer to come an agreement about the final price. Example: Tumhara bhi nahi, mera bhi nahi. Last price 350. ---------------- Vaat lag gaya Translation: I/We’re screwed! Meaning: If you ever find yourself in a soup, you should know Vaat Lag Gaya. Example: I was ...
Post a Comment
Read more

India: The land of the wise

Photo by Andreas Wohlfahrt from Pexels In my country, unfortunately, free advice is distributed like condoms at an orgy. On 18 September 2019, I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy, Rivan. Since then, I have received a cornucopia of advice and comments from family, friends and absolute strangers. Here are some of these gems. Baby’s Massage Lady: He is not digesting his milk. Burp him. You don’t know how to hold the baby. You should always swaddle him. You should always keep his head covered. You should never use a bottle. Stop using the AC. Don't switch on the fan. He feels cold. How will you find his powder puff if you never go out and look for it? You're too slow. He'll turn 6 months old by the time you finish putting on his diaper. Doctor: Don’t use a bottle. Husband’s relatives: (When I was carrying my baby): We are only telling you the list of names that you should not keep. Or this child will be doomed. (On the day ...
2 comments
Read more

A Letter To My Dad

I penned this letter to my Dad a few months after he passed away. Here goes… It has been 8 months since you left but I still can't bring myself to accept the fact that you are gone forever. Everyday I think of ways of how I can bring you back. It makes me want to scream when I realize that it is not possible. All I end up doing is cry till my eyes hurt. When you left, you took a part of me with you. Nobody and nothing can ever fill the void left in my heart by your loss. I am sorry for not telling you each day how much I loved you. Sometimes, I used to wonder if you had superpowers because you somehow managed to do the most impossible tasks with utmost ease. All of this just to bring a smile on my face. You played multiple roles - best drinking buddy, most patient shopping & day-out partner. This is why I called you my Superman and you shall always continue to remain my hero. Although I can no longer see you, I can still feel you guiding and supporting me in my...
1 comment
Read more